When you take a moment to examine people’s lives, you come to the inexplicable conclusion that the most successful are the ones who make the most mistakes and are continually embarrassed in public. There are many intelligent, sophisticated, urbane, erudite, educated individuals who somehow never realize their potential because they are afraid of public embarrassment. That fear far overrides their willingness to attempt, “it is not worth the risk” they rationalize.
In Larry Wilson’s book “Play To Win”, the “Playing not to lose strategy” is given the following treatment.
“Avoid all potentially embarrassing situations or situations where you might lose emotional control. Don’t try new things (at least in public) because you might look foolish and be “embarrassed to death.” Always practice new dances at home, in a closet, in the dark where no one can see you. It is better to be an expert than a learner – learners are always trying new things and making mistakes.”
In study after study asking individuals in their later years what they would have done differently, the answer invariably is that they would look at the “big picture” and “taken a few more risks”. No one ever says I took too many risks. Possibly that is because those who took the risks are dead and not available for the survey. After all traits are adaptive, those who run to fight another day outlast those who stay and fight. I think it was Mussolini who said “better to live one day as a lion than one hundred years as a lamb”
I have two recommendations today, 1) read “Play To Win”, 2) Fear Not”
